Location: Hotel Riverside, Las Olas, Fort Lauderdale
Conditions: 85F 100% humidity. The air is humid and sticky, feeling uncomfortable
Situation
I am on a sea trial trip to Fort Lauderdale to meet Monica, her owner, and her broker.
Observation
I am very nervous.
Action
Trying to figure out why I am nervous.
Result
The reasons of my anxiety are not obvious. The purchase agreement gives me a way out of the transaction. This visit provides me with a graceful exit. It should make the transaction safe for me. This visit is not a job interview. The owner cannot get the boat away from me if he does not like me.
This visit is not even a survey. I am not spending thousands to get boat doctors to give a complete checkup. There is little money involved. If I don’t like the boat, I can go back home and keep looking for a better boat.
So, what is at stake exactly?
Reflections
The experience reminds me of going on a first date. I have invested emotionally in this boat based on a few pictures a little like I might have invested in a relationship before meeting a date by just looking at pretty pictures in a dating app.
The first date is the reality check.
This is the time where the fantasy becomes reality. Meeting the date may be disappointing. There is a chance that I ignore the red flags because I “need” this relationship to work, because I don’t have a real alternative, because I need to project myself in the future even though deep within I wonder if she really is the future I aspire to.
If I continue the transaction, I will trust my life to this boat. Is she trustworthy? Will she provide physical safety? Will she provide emotional safety? Am I committing to an abusive relationship?
How many years am I going to spend with her? What will she teach me? What growth opportunities will she provide? What limitations is she going to reveal after a few seasons? When am I going to outgrow her?
Lesson and Next Step
A boat purchase is much more than a financial transaction. It’s the extension of chain of custody not unlike a father entrusting the bride to the groom.
Maybe the nerves aren’t fear of meeting her, but of meeting a part of myself I haven’t yet seen.
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